Time to say goodbye

Friday was my last day at work. I can't believe that was really my last last day! I still remember how I took up this job just to pass time until I found another job. Funny how every time I wanted to leave, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Sure it was tough and the pay did not justify the shit I had to deal with. But it a way, the whole experience was fulfilling. Very fulfilling. One thing's for sure, my patience has improved tremendously. I usually like things done chop chop. I used to get really irritated when the children took half an hour to nibble their biscuits. But now, I can deal with waiting. Just don't make me wait too long! I used to wrinkle up my nose at children who crap their pants and I cannot bear touching vomit. Now, I reach out instinctively when they want to throw up. Yup right into my cupped hands. I think when you genuinely love a person; you just love them, flaws and all. You love them even when they're covered in puke from head to toe. I love each and every one of them. And I'll miss them like hell.

My grandmother's in the hospital. I don't really like her but I went to visit her nonetheless. To my surprise, I found myself stroking her hair and trying my best to ease her pain. I didn't know I had it in me since she said a lot of hurtful stuff all my life. Just because I appear nonchalant, it does not mean that I'm not hurt. Sometimes, I just desperately wish she'll love me.

I'm getting irritated with romance novels. It's all the same- unrealistic and clinched. Either that or I'm just unromantic

I miss you. But big girls don't cry yes?